The Audacity Of Hope

There was once a fifteen year old boy who dreamt of becoming a basketball player. His friends and family were in full support of his ambition. But, I guess, his fate didn’t support him. On the eve of his school’s basketball match, he was kicked out of the team by his coach because he wasn’t tall enough.

All the other players were 6 feet or taller. He was 5’10. That left him heart-broken. He felt angry, at himself, and at life, for having treated him so badly. He had practiced regularly for months. He had worked hard. He had sweated it out. He deserved to get a chance to play. But life wasn’t fair to him, like it isn’t for most of us. The faith inside him was shaken. But he hung on to his ambition. He clung on to hope. A hope, that someday he would be the basketball star he wished to be.

During the summer after his sophomore year, he trained rigorously. He grew four inches during that time. The next year he was selected in the team. After two years he earned the basketball scholarship at a celebrated university. He led his college basketball team and won them all the games. He was named player of the year. He won many awards and titles during his college basketball career. Later, he went on to become the greatest basketball player of all time. He is none other than Michael Jordan.

Had he not hung on, we would have missed seeing a legend. Had he given up after failing, he would probably be working at a local coffee shop today. Had he lost hope, he wouldn’t have become the star he wanted to be. This, is the audacity of hope.

You will fall down. You will get hurt. There will be times when you’ll feel empty, hollow. Then, the easiest choice will be to give up. But you must hang on. You must not quit. When all is lost, there is one thing to support you: Hope. It takes a lot of courage, yes, to hold on when the times are dark. But you can do it. Everyone can. You just need to tell yourself that everything will be alright soon. Then it most certainly will be. It is said that the darkest hour of the night comes just before dawn. I couldn’t agree more. When you're at your lowest point, when all seems lost, have hope, because things can only get better from there on.  When things are extremely bad, it may signal that they are about to get much better.You always see things at their worst just before things get better. Life is like a rollercoaster, you're down one minute and up the next. Just stay strong because peaks always follow troughs.

“I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”- Michael Jordan 

HOW DO YOU HANDLE NEGATIVITY?...

Have you ever been faced with trying to stay positive when others around you are negative? Negative people can be a challenge to be around. They will bring you down and drain your energy. Whether your friend or classmate has an occasional negative day or you deal with a family member, friend or co-worker that is chronically negative, there are things you can do to remain positive in the face of negativity. . .




1. Let the Negativity Pass
Whatever you do, do not argue with a negative person. Arguing only adds fuel to the fire. A negative person will feed off any negativity that will strengthen his mood or attitude. Their negativity intensifies and the situation gets worse before it gets better. Sometimes the best thing to do is remain silent and let the negativity pass.

2. Negative People Need Love
You know how difficult it can be to give love and positive attention to negative people. Unfortunately, that is often exactly what they need. Deep inside that mean and critical person is a person that is usually afraid he or she is unlovable. It is our challenge to rise above the negative attitude and love the injured person inside. How do you show love when someone is negative? You must listen to what she is trying to tell you. Acknowledge the feelings she has by saying something like, "You sound very angry right now". Even if you don't quite understand the person's feelings, know that your reality is different than someone else's. Ask how you might help the negative person. This shows genuine interest in her happiness. Offer a hug even if you get rejected. Remember not to take a rejection of your love personally. A negative person often has difficulty receiving love from others.

3. Focus on the Positive
If you try really hard, there is always something positive to be found in any situation. Even a negative person has positive qualities. When a person is drowning in negativity, it can be difficult for them to see the positive. They forget about all the great things they are doing. I admit that sometimes a negative person doesn't want to see the positive. This might require her to shift her outlook. Negativity can become a habit and habits are hard to break. Be patient and gently remind your irritable friend or family member to look for the the silver lining at the end of the dark cloud. Hopefully, in her down time, she will begin to reflect on what you have said.

4. Detach and Avoid Trying to Change the Negative Person
Learning to detach emotionally from a negative person can greatly benefit you and the other person. A negative person will fight you if you try to change them. If you want, you can try a little reverse psychology and agree with everything she says. I once read a great article about a mother who was exasperated with her son's negative mood. Everything she tried to soothe him and make him feel better backfired. She finally gave up and started agreeing with everything he said. When her son told her his friends were mean, she agreed with him. When he complained that his teacher didn't know anything, she couldn't agree more. After several minutes of this kind of dialogue with her son, his mood suddenly shifted. He declared that he was tired and he went to bed with a smile on his face.

5. Stay Away from Negative People
If you have negative people in your life that are critically affecting your mental and physical health, you need to evaluate whether or not you want these people in your life. Some people are so chronically negative that you have no other choice but to remove them from your life. It's possible to do that with colleagues. You can find another job if your boss or other co-workers are bringing you down. Other people, such as friends and family, are difficult to remove from your life. In this instance, professional counseling may be the answer. To protect your well being, you need to enforce very strong boundaries with negative people.

6. Keep Your Own Negative Thoughts and Behaviors in Check
If you do nothing else but focus on managing your own negative thoughts and behavior, you will come a long way towards remaining positive. A negative attitude is contagious, but a positive attitude is infectious as well. Hang out with positive people that encourage you to be your best self. Use positive affirmations to overcome negative self-talk. Express your gratitude for all the positive things in your life. Take the time everyday to watch all the beautiful things going on around you. Read inspirational material and listen to joyful music. Do whatever you have to do to remain positive and happy despite the negativity you face.

The world will be a better place because of you and your attitude. And you never know, you just might help a negative person make a change to a better way of living.

BRICK WALLS

    

  We all have to face obstacles and hurdles in life. It is the same for all. Life is unfair for all. We have to be prepared for it. Trust me on this- you will fall down, you will get hurt, there will be people trying to stop you from achieving your goal, there will be days when you’ll feel lost, betrayed, wronged. Like I said, it is the same for all. But then why is it that some people are more successful than others?...why do some people lead a better life than others?...why are some people so rich and some so poor?...if everyone has to face similar adversities in life why is it that some people suffer while others prosper?...

The reason is very simple. We all face difficulties, but what makes us different from the others is how we choose to respond to those difficulties. When something bad happens, there are three ways in which people usually respond-

• Their self-esteem falls apart. Their emotions take over their brain. They can’t think clearly. These people generally have the ability, resources and intelligence to accomplish what they want to but they become weak when things don’t go as expected and begin to lose hope. Gradually, as life goes on and they have to face more hardships, they cry, they lose all hope and finally give up.

• Then, there are people who blame their luck for whatever happens to them. When they have to go through hard times, they blame life for it. “Life is not fair”, “I am so unlucky”, “god is favoring the others” are the common phrases you would have heard from these people. They are always making excuses. They want to succeed, but they refuse to accept their mistakes. They are always blaming others, luck and life for whatever they did wrong.

• They accept their mistakes and learn from them. They don’t blame life or luck for their bad times. Neither do they sit and cry. They don’t let their emotions take control of them and they don’t get mad when everything is going bad for them. They always remain in control of their actions and think clearly before taking action. These are the people who ultimately succeed.

So here are a few important things which you need to remember-

→ “You will fall down, you will get hurt but there are better things to do than wallow in self-pity”

      → Have a positive attitude. Believe in yourself. Build your self-esteem.  

“If you think you can or if you think you can’t, either way you are right” 

→Never give up. If you fail once, try again, and keep trying till you succeed.

“A man who succeeds does not succeed because he is braver than the others, it’s because he was brave for ten more minutes.”

→Learn from your mistakes. Making a mistake is alright, but making the same mistake again is not.

→Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment;  so if you’re having a bad day, don’t worry-you might be getting a whole lot of experience.

→Don’t lose hope.

→Brick walls are there for a reason- they are there to stop those from going ahead who don’t want it badly. They are there to separate the ones who want something badly from those who have a casual approach. If you want something badly, you gotta fight for it and overcome the obstacles in your way. 

BEST OF LUCK  :)