Do we most value the things that are difficult to attain?

Those who have overcome great adversity in life can take satisfaction from Thomas Paine’s assertion, “The harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph.” For people truly to appreciate their victories, they must be able to contrast them with the hardships they have undergone. To value their good fortune, they must suffer ill fortune as well.

In most cases, the greater the adversity the more proud and triumphant we feel on reaching our goal. This is largely due to the fact that we attach a lot of value to our time and effort. Thus, when we reach our goal, it becomes a lot more valued because of the time and effort spent in attaining it.

When we are kids, our parents give us money to go out and buy stuff. At that time the money is readily available to us and we keep asking for more. We don’t bother too much if we lose some or waste some here and there. We don’t attach a lot of value to it. That’s because it’s o readily and easily available to us. But, when we go out in the real world and start earning, it is then that we realize the value of money. That has suddenly become much more prized for us because of the time and hard work we spent in earning it.

Likewise, we might suppose that for a great football player like Wayne Rooney scoring one goal may not be a very big thing. But when that goal is scored at the last moment of a defining match it becomes so precious that he celebrates by removing his T-shirt and running around the field.

What matters is what we feel inside our head. If we have faced great obstacles in attaining something, it becomes much more precious for us. The most important fights to fight are the hardest ones, the ones that cost some people everything they have. Only by fighting such a hard fight will you truly value your victory.

The Audacity Of Hope

There was once a fifteen year old boy who dreamt of becoming a basketball player. His friends and family were in full support of his ambition. But, I guess, his fate didn’t support him. On the eve of his school’s basketball match, he was kicked out of the team by his coach because he wasn’t tall enough.

All the other players were 6 feet or taller. He was 5’10. That left him heart-broken. He felt angry, at himself, and at life, for having treated him so badly. He had practiced regularly for months. He had worked hard. He had sweated it out. He deserved to get a chance to play. But life wasn’t fair to him, like it isn’t for most of us. The faith inside him was shaken. But he hung on to his ambition. He clung on to hope. A hope, that someday he would be the basketball star he wished to be.

During the summer after his sophomore year, he trained rigorously. He grew four inches during that time. The next year he was selected in the team. After two years he earned the basketball scholarship at a celebrated university. He led his college basketball team and won them all the games. He was named player of the year. He won many awards and titles during his college basketball career. Later, he went on to become the greatest basketball player of all time. He is none other than Michael Jordan.

Had he not hung on, we would have missed seeing a legend. Had he given up after failing, he would probably be working at a local coffee shop today. Had he lost hope, he wouldn’t have become the star he wanted to be. This, is the audacity of hope.

You will fall down. You will get hurt. There will be times when you’ll feel empty, hollow. Then, the easiest choice will be to give up. But you must hang on. You must not quit. When all is lost, there is one thing to support you: Hope. It takes a lot of courage, yes, to hold on when the times are dark. But you can do it. Everyone can. You just need to tell yourself that everything will be alright soon. Then it most certainly will be. It is said that the darkest hour of the night comes just before dawn. I couldn’t agree more. When you're at your lowest point, when all seems lost, have hope, because things can only get better from there on.  When things are extremely bad, it may signal that they are about to get much better.You always see things at their worst just before things get better. Life is like a rollercoaster, you're down one minute and up the next. Just stay strong because peaks always follow troughs.

“I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”- Michael Jordan 

Time management; Become the master of your day

The Three Fearless Men

Here is an interesting story about three men who had a common problem : Fear. 
Fear has the power to get the worst of the best of us. We should throw it out of our lives. Doing that isn't that difficult. This story might tell you how. ....

There was once a wise man who lived on top of a mountain. That place was so high that there no vegetation or wildlife could grow there. There weren’t even any insects there. He used to live there all alone, occasionally climbing down to get his food and water. He would sit there and meditate. People all over the country had heard about him. They thought that he could solve all their problems. But it was difficult for everyone to go high up there, so rarely anyone visited him.

In a village near that mountain, there lived three friends. All of them had a common problem: fear. Fear had conquered their lives. They couldn’t sleep, eat, drink or work with ease. They decided to visit that old wise man up the mountain. Then they started off on their journey to the top of the mountain, or rather journey to answers, answers that would help them to release their fear. They went from village to village, forest to forest and reached the Nadir of the mountain. It was all uphill from there. They began climbing the mountain, fighting off all the obstacles that came in their way. Finally, after 9 days of incessant travel they reached the top of the mountain. The old man was sitting right there, meditating. The three friends went near him and seated themselves. The old man opened his eyes almost instantly, as if he had sensed that they were there. He asked them why they had come and they told them how they had traveled all the way to solve their common problem: Fear. The old man addressed the first friend and asked him, “What do you fear, young man?” The friend replied, “I fear death. I sometimes even lose sleep over it.” “Hmm…... Death. Now I will take out the fear from you. Death will not come for you until you are ready for its embrace. Know that and you will have nothing to fear.”

This calmed his mind and he feared death no longer.

Then the old man addressed the second friend, “What do you fear, young man?”

“I fear my new neighbors. They do strange things. They observe holy days different from mine. And they have too many kids. They listen to weird music that sounds like noise. They are complete strangers and I don’t know them at all. I am afraid of them. What should I do?”

“Ah, strangers” said the wise man. “I will take away this fear. Return to your home and make a cake for your new neighbors. Get toys for their children. Become friends with them. Join them in their songs. You will become familiar with these neighbors and your fear will go away.”

 The second man saw the wisdom in these words and knew that he would no longer fear his new neighbors.

Then the old man turned to the 3^rd friend. “What do you fear, young man?”

“O wise man, I fear spiders. At night I get bad dreams in which I see spiders climbing on flesh and biting it. I feel terrified.”

“Ahh……Spiders……

No shit! Why do you think I live way up here???!”

THE END

P.S.- Fear will get the worst of the best of us so I suggest you throw it out of your lives. J

Living in the Moment

One of the games that we played in my workshop (Apna Shakespeare) was the 1-30 game. In this game we all sit in a circle with our eyes closed, and count from 1-30 (one person says '1' the other says '2' and so on...)

Whenever there is an overlap (2 people say the number at the same time), we start from 1 again. But our eyes are closed so we have no way of knowing who is speaking when. We just have to feel the vibe and decide which the best time to speak is. It may seem easy but let me tell you it is not.

During the first few days we barely managed to cross 10. Jaimini kept telling us not to think about the end result. He told us, “don’t think about reaching 30, thinking about going from 1 to 2, 2 to 3 and so on. Enjoy yourself and live in the moment.” As we followed his advice, we began to improve. We stopped worrying about reaching 30 and started having fun. We focused on going from number to number and not from 1 to 30. by the end of the workshop, we reached 28. That is quiet an improvement from day 1 when we were on 6.

There is a valuable lesson here: don’t worry about the end result, live in the moment and enjoy the journey. As we grow older, we become very result-oriented.

                        “Yesterday is history, 
                         tomorrow is a mystery,
                         today is a gift
                        and that is why it is called is present.”

Live in the moment. Take pleasure in what you are doing. Don’t worry about reaching the end. Enjoy the journey, and soon you’ll realize that the journey itself is your destination.